He was happy. I guess.
Maybe because of her existence. Just maybe. He loves her, I bet he does. He taught her life and they inspired each other. He accepted her imperfections and she welcomed his flaws. He was willing to spend the rest of his life with her and perhaps she feels the same way.
The trouble is, that was what he told me when I crept into his life. He said, “Everything has changed since you came baby”. “You are my everything now”. Such pleasuring words to hear. He claims to have a different perspective in life now. I think it’s a good thing. He tells me about his plans, his choices, about what haunts him at night, his doubts, and his preferences. He gave me his attention, love, affection and the biggest factor, assurance.
But didn’t he assured her too? I think it’s kind of cliché that because of the situation, she receive compliments from eyes everywhere while I deal with glares. She is the alibi he makes. I should deny him, because he denies me. That’s the rule to keep things stable. But I don’t think so because we’re already in trouble. Other than waiting, both has to try harder because if you want something in life you have to earn it. Things won’t work unless you do something about it.
We are in real trouble. Yet we have this soul connection. I’m confident that it’s something they don’t have. I can hear his screams when he’s the most silent. I can look into his eyes and I could figure out what he really need. For sure, I know his soul the way he knows mine. I’m still searching for an edge though. To win his choice, his heart, and his soul. To have him and make him happy despite the trouble we ran ourselves into. Well, that’s what he said.
That he is happy. I’m sure.
Silverlinings 